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Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.

(January 4, 2014 7:25 pm)Post Number 1989
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(January 4, 2014 7:25 pm)Post Number 1988
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Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-Box.

(January 4, 2014 6:06 am)Post Number 1987
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In the begining there was nothing and God said 'Let there be light', and there was still nothing but everybody could see it.

(January 4, 2014 6:06 am)Post Number 1986
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Silence is argument carried out by other means.

(January 3, 2014 3:00 pm)Post Number 1985
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I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.

(January 3, 2014 2:32 pm)Post Number 1984
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Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.

(January 3, 2014 4:26 am)Post Number 1983
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I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying.

(January 2, 2014 10:38 pm)Post Number 1982
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Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.

(January 2, 2014 12:13 pm)Post Number 1981
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The use of anthropomorphic terminology when dealing with computing systems is a symptom of professional immaturity.

(January 2, 2014 6:15 am)Post Number 1980
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Not only is there no God, but you try getting a plumber at weekends.

(January 1, 2014 9:05 pm)Post Number 1979
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Computer dating is fine, if you're a computer.

(January 1, 2014 8:20 pm)Post Number 1978
The truth is more important than the facts.

(January 1, 2014 12:03 pm)Post Number 1977
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Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy -- the mother.

(January 1, 2014 12:03 pm)Post Number 1976
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Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches.

(December 31, 2013 6:08 pm)Post Number 1975